“Moooooommmmm! I’m getting snow blinded from the glare off your WHITE legs!” bellowed my son.
Yup, I was born white, pasty, pale and now colorless. For a time in my childhood, I had a faint touch of pink with a broad sprinkling of freckles everywhere, but overall I was just plain white! When we lived in Washington, I seemed to fit in with everyone, but when we moved to the California beach in the 60’s, white definitely was NOT “in”!
Dark brown was the color of choice down there, and I worked so hard to fit in. On the weekends, I would rise from bed, gulp down a quick breakfast and dash off to the beach to soak in as many ultraviolet rays as possible. I was going to convert myself into a golden-bronze goddess with long, blond hair like the rest of the surf bunnies. However, I was going to need some magic here as I was tall, white, with medium length, auburn-reddish, naturally, curly hair that frizzed at the mere mention of moisture.
After years of lying in the sun, I think I did succeed in burning off any freckle I had on my body. Now, not only do I not tan, I’m whiter than when I started! I always thought the ultraviolet rays would attack the people with crocodile skin… not this white pansy.
Who KNEW what ultraviolet rays would do? After all of my years lying in the sun I now deal with skin cancer… so now I’m polka-dotted!