X – X-Rays



X-ray embarassing X-ray of dog








Oh man, talk about the truth coming out of hiding!

When I walked into my physical therapist’s office for the first time, I brought a disk of my x-rays of my back, so the poor man would know what my dilemma is.  The problem is that I had no concept of how enlightening the x-rays would be.  Years ago, I had seen some x-rays of my teeth, and later x-rays of my knees, and all these pictures showed were my bones.  I can handle THAT!

In the days before 3D x-rays all we saw were skeletal pictures leaving the flesh details to our imagination—or so I thought!  Now technology has improved, as I was about to learn!  My physical therapist invited me into his office to examine the x-rays with him so he could point out what was wrong with my back.

Keep in mind that despite my “wild and whacky” ways I am pretty conservative about some things… like I hide in the dark to change my clothes as I don’t want to scare anyone.  After all, after bearing two children, my body didn’t want to go back to “the way it was” prior to my kids’ births.  My lean bikini days are LONG GONE!

So, here I am back in my physical therapist’s office and he has loaded the disk of my back and the pictures are slowly coming up on the screen of his computer.  Realize; the x-rays show from my shoulders down past my waist to my hips.  What I was not prepared for was how realistic the pictures would be as they included my flesh as well as my bones.  Just what I “wanted” to do… stand essentially naked in front of an unknown man; as to me the pictures depicted me as “Granny” from the old cartoons in the Playboy Magazine. 

I worked hard at not shrieking, “Oh My God!  That CAN’T be me!” as I contrived to hide my vivid flush that spread across my face.  To add insult to injury the x-ray technician’s descriptive report even described the food still digesting in my colon.  I was so embarrassed I’m not sure my therapist witnessed me crawling from his office to escape these sights!

The next time the doctor wants me to get x-rayed I’m wearing a suit of armor with a skeleton etched on it.

About Gwynn Rogers

After 20 years of sales and marketing experience in the fields of real estate, high tech, and corporate travel, Gwynn has moved on to the career of “Grandma.” When not teaching her granddaughters an extensive vocabulary of “alley-oop-boop, ups-a-daisy, cowabunga or bummer”, Gwynn can be found hunting for mentors for the Kitsap Youth Mentoring Consortium, or chasing her fantasies on her treadmill. Gwynn currently freelances for magazines.
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16 Responses to X – X-Rays

  1. pat garcia says:

    This is so funny I had to laugh. I am not laughing at you but at your wonderful perception and stamina to deal with things that may be unpleasant. You have a wonderful sense of humour.
    Oh, next time, don’t wear armor. By then they will have found a way to depict every cell and it movement, so all is exposed. 🙂

    Love you.

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      As I told Susan, I was SO looking forward to seeing my spine. What I didn’t take into consideration was the FAT on my body plus, a good portion of my BOOB that he got to see too. Sadly, I’m rather large. You know those comic pictures of the old ladies with their boobs hanging down to their knees… well that’s ME!! So much for my being delusional and remembering my body of the “good old days!” 😉 I’m glad you laughed Pat. I’m laughing too, only my face is flushed! 😉 Hugs, Gwynn

  2. Susan Scott says:

    O my goodness Gwynn! You’ve put me off ever having any xrays. Or I’ll ask the xray man to send me a report. I do NOT want to know what’s going on in the old digestive thank you very much. But, as usual, I had to smile so thank you!

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      Ohhh Susan, in my case I was concerned about the extra fat on my body, plus I’m quite top heavy so part of my boobs were featured in the x-rays too. Remember my being “delusional” well the x-ray KILLS any thoughts of looking like I ONCE did!! I go to women doctors too, so ending up with a MAN and an unknown man at that time was beyond embarrassing for me!

      I HAD been very curious to see what my spine looked like until I saw what he saw… GASP!!! How in the WORLD do I manage to get myself in these positions??? 😉

  3. Yikes, I had no idea these X-rays were so detailed these days! I’m laughing from reading your post, but I’d be freaked by that level of exposure.

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      Yup… talk about my worst nightmare of standing out in the public naked… well THERE I was!! In front of a cute somewhat younger man too. The x-rays voided any attempt on my part to be delusional too! RATS!! 😉 Life’s embarrassing moments.

  4. That’s pretty frightening. I had no idea such x-rays existed. All the ones they took of my arm last year when I broke the elbow joint were of the old fashioned variety that just shows bones in black & white. I guess there are some things the patient is better off not knowing about – like your overly detailed x-ray.

  5. stephen tremp says:

    Ha! Thanks for the laughs!

    Stephen Tremp
    A-Z Co-host
    X is for Xenoglossy

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      Hey, Stephen, you’re a guy… you don’t have anything to hide, especially with another guy. I was SO EMBARRASSED!! All my delusions went up in smoke! 😉 Thanks for laughing with me.

  6. Oh, that’s AWFUL, Gwynn. I did not know that. I’m not having any x-rays. Or, I’ll wait until Patricia’s prediction comes into being.

    Glad YOU can laugh about it. OK, and it made me smile, too. Thanks.

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      Samantha, if I don’t laugh, I’ll go into hiding… that experience was when I first met Mark. Then with some of the physical therapy he actually saw the flesh too… the real me… GROANNNNNN!! However, it is no different from us standing in front of a doctor practically naked. Life’s embarrassing moments! Thanks for laughing with me.

  7. Hilarious, Gwynn. You, my dear, are hilarious. I would’ve dashed out the door if someone described the food digesting inside my colon. I’m with you.
    So funny.

    • Gwynn Rogers says:

      My only suggestion is if you are having x-rays of your back, don’t eat for several weeks. Maybe then your colon will be empty… and the technician’s comments won’t include the words “bowel movement or gas.” SHEESH!! What they can see now-a-days!!!

      But they are professionals right… they see far worse… RIGHT???? Please tell me they see worse than me!!! 😉 Hugs… and thanks for laughing with me!

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